Post 8: perception
November 28, 2023
Our experiences form our perceptions which construct our beliefs which influence how we see things and how we act. All of this combines to form our reality in a sense. Everything is intertwined, which is beautiful, and sort of scary. I touched on this a bit in Post 4, but have more thoughts about it.
I am so scared for how I will carry my past into my future. I am not only scared for my own well-being, but the well-being of those around me. What if I think I can carry the negative from my past in a constructive and positive way, but I fail? What if I slip up and end up hurting someone else? What if I negatively affect a new relationship because of past trauma? I feel like I’m always fluctuating…and I don’t want to come off as fake because my thoughts have potential to change. * insert Intrusive Thoughts by Natalie Jane *. I think this is where I have to rely on God. I know it is.
This is also where choices come into play—see Post 4.
When I find myself ruminating on past negative experiences—unfairness, extreme anger, betrayal, hurt, deception, all of it—I get really upset. Why am I going in circles? Why isn’t this getting any better? Why can’t I just move on? It’s extremely annoying that we cannot change our past. Other times, I feel encouraged and dare I say hopeful about how my past can positively influence my future, and even the future of others. And these positive thoughts are proof that it is getting better.
We cannot change our past, but we can determine our future. You and me can choose if what happened to us will change us for better or for worse. And that is freaking beautiful. We can’t change our experiences, but we can decide how we perceive them—will we ask God to help us see them in a positive light? Or will we continue to identify as the victim?
Side note: There’s a quote I like that relates to our perception of others. It goes like, “why attribute to malice what could be attributed to ignorance?” In other words—why think that someone is intentionally hurting or offending you when they most likely didn’t mean anything by what they did? Obviously, this is where grounded discernment comes into play—if someone is intentionally hurtful to you, some sort of boundary needs to be set. But this quote can make us ponder how we see the world—are we too reactive and offendable? SIDE NOTE: definitely going to write about a devotional I did “the search for an un-offendable heart.”
A truth that inspired me to make the choice to forgive the person who hurt me most is that they are a child of God. As beautiful as this is, it was hard to accept. I think it can be hard to surrender pain because it seems like we’re invalidating it—but this is not the truth.
The world is full of people, and we are all sons and daughters of God. Forgiveness is hard. Choosing to perceive someone who caused you immense pain in a positive or even compassionate way is hard. Start by realizing they are a child of God, and they are a sinner, just like you and me. This doesn’t excuse their wrongs by any means, but I think it can help to begin removing the anger from your heart and paving a path to freedom in forgiveness.
sad gorl songs:
Heart They Didn’t Break — Maddie & Tae (my friends are unreal. huge shoutout to them).
HAPPY GORL SONG LFG:
free me — anees
whyiscchappy? Twinkly Christmas lights. And my mom.